So my first full week working at the Havens is over. At
Namwianga there are 3 Havens, and we have 4 interns. So Meagan decided to split
us up and have us try one specific haven/job each week. So this week I was
assigned to Haven 3. Haven 3 is a “hospice” haven where all the sick babies
are. We have kids from a couple months old to 7 years old. And they have all
different things such as failure to thrive, HIV, TB, club feet, and special
needs. So Tuesday was my first day in Haven 3, and I shadowed an auntie named
Georgina. I did everything with her starting with tea time in the morning,
feeding the babies lunch, bath time, nap time, our lunch break, laundry, and
more feeding and changing babies in the afternoon. She works in a room of 4
babies. One is Nelson who is a preemie, 2 months old, and weighs probably 4
pounds. Rodwell is probably a couple months old also and just can’t seem to
gain weight. They don’t know what is wrong with him so they keep in the hospice
haven just to monitor is feeding and health. There are 2 older babies, Petra and
Candace. They are the sweetest little girls! So that was my job for the week;
helping Georgina take care of these 4 sick babes.
I thought I knew was this job was going to be like. I have
been here before. I spent every day for 3 months in the havens. And I especially
spent time in Haven 3 because that’s where my baby Matt lived. But boy was I
wrong. Last time I was here, I spent time in the Haven playing with my baby and
that’s it. I didn’t take care of every little last detail that needed to be
done. So this week came as a surprise to me. By the end of day 1, I was worn
out and tired. I don’t know how the aunties do it. It’s nonstop all day every
day. I guess it’s what being a mother is like, but for us it was a mother to 4
sick babies who needed some extra care and attention. I got to the haven, had
my tea and roll for breakfast, fed the 4 babies and put them down for a nap,
played with the older kids until my babies woke up, fed them lunch, bathed
them, changed them, washed their nappies and clothes, fed them again, put them
down for a nap, walked to Georgina’s village to eat lunch, walked back to the
Haven, changed our babies, and put them down while we played and fed the older
kids dinner. That’s what Georgina does every day. And her lunch break isn’t a
relaxing break. It’s a 10 minute walk home, to bath and change her 3 kids, cook
lunch for them and herself, and then walk back to the Havens. She’s always working
and taking care of others.
It was a hard week if I’m going to be honest. I was the only
“makua” (white person) in the Havens so I spent my day listening to people
speak Tonga. I had never realized how hard it is to go all day without having a
real conversation. I could talk to the aunties and to the babies, but it was
very surface level. I don’t know that much Tonga and they don’t know that much
English, so it was very basic. It was also hard because I didn’t want to step
on the aunties’ toes, seem lazy, or be a bother to them. This is the job that
they do every day, and I didn’t want them to think I was coming in to show them
how to take care of the babies that they love. Sometimes I felt like I was
unwanted and was doing the job wrong, but I know that they just love the babies
and want what’s best for them. They were very patient with me while I learned
to bath them, wash the laundry by hand, make their lunch, and so much more. I’m
sure I didn’t do everything right, but no matter how annoyed they probably were
they were very understanding and forgiving. And the week was hard because I was
stuck comparing it to last time I was here. My last trip was very free; we
could come and go from the Havens when we wanted, play with the kids we wanted,
and be with 30 other friends. It was “fun.” And this week was “work.” It was my
job to be at the haven at 9 in the morning and work until 18:00 when the babies
where in bed and I could go home. It was my job to feed, change, bath, and
work. I wasn’t just there to play. So this was hard to adjust to. I had to
adjust my mind, my heart, and my attitude. At first, I wanted the “easy” life.
I wanted to sit and hold a baby, feed one when I felt like it, and go home. I didn’t
want to spend the day changing sick babies nappies, getting nsima thrown all
over me, and doing the laundry by hand. I didn’t want to eat nsima for lunch; I
wanted my yummy “normal” food. I didn’t want to be away from my friends all day
long. But I quickly realized how stupid I was being and prayed for God to
change my attitude. I was living a life that was helping me gain so much
appreciation for what I do have. I was gaining appreciation for the work the
aunties do. I was gaining appreciation for Meagan and this life that she chose.
I was gaining appreciation for my God who has blessed me with a life that makes
this one so far beyond our understanding that sometimes it’s hard to accept. The
week was hard. Most nights I came home tired and annoyed. But it was a
wonderful week. I learned to suck it up and do the dirty work. I learned how
much of a servant heart it takes and how much faith it takes. I learned how to
find joy in the little things. And I learned to thank God for the ability to
love these messy, fussy, beautiful babies who just need someone to love them.
The aunties give their lives to loving these babies, and now I get to do that
too for 7 weeks.
